Fight all year and the next, and next, and next, and next.
Wednesday and the last day of the year. I slept much better last night probably due to the fact that I got a lot more water down me during the day. My partner was going off to see her mother with her brother, so after taking my vitals, all still good, I shower and decide to go out for breakfast. Having got paper I wander down to the village pub and indulged in Eggs Benedict and an Americano. It was nice to sit and do the crosswords and then amble back home.
I made the fatal mistake of beginning to sort out my partners 1000 piece jigsaw. I go the jigsaw board out and started to look for “whimsies” and the straight edged pieces. I also produced little piles of same coloured pieces. I spent hours doing this and of course when my partner returned I continued to idly put odd pieces together. Before I realised I had spent hours on this activity which I swore years ago I would never do again. Just goes to show how easily trapped one can get by a jigsaw.
In the end I escape to the garden to put my new scented candle in the writing Shed and top up the suet balls in the bird feeder. Its very cold, so I close the cold frames. As I look at the garden i a bowled over by the amount of “stuff” coming up and in particular the fact that the Peony is shooting. Its far too early for this sort of growing but there it is.
Peony’s in December, ridiculously early!
Bulbs coming up all over the place!
I take time to draft the blog. A short one today, I’ve nothing really to say, I’m doing the best I can at the moment given the chemo and I am not sad to see the year go. 2026 is a challenge year and there are things that will happen that will give me joy alongside the inevitable nasty surprises that will come along. I shall probably quietly Hootenanny and go of to bed hoping for a good nights sleep, which I might just aid with a farewell to 2025 brandy. I hope everyone has a brilliant New Year and that the coming year brings you your desires. My only aims are to stay alive as healthy as possible, see my new grandson, due to arrive at any moment and to publish at least one more collection of poems
Tuesday and I wake after a grim nights sleep. I woke at regular intervals feeling tired and needing to drink, I have clearly not drunk enough water and needed to get a new bottle in the middle of the night. Everything tastes rank, especially water or water based drinks. I am having trouble breathing freely through my nose as it feels blocked, I wonder if I have had a small nose bleed again. Finally I get to the morning and take my vitals, I am surprised that they are so good. My plan was to begin to start to swim at the gym but an email has come though to say the pool is closed all week due to poor ventilation. I take time to get myself together and write something. It is one of those poems that is not welcome but it comes anyway.
486 “fed up with death, decay and dying. It sucks the life out of the living,” said my friend, and now I lay here full of poison and wonder how much life I suck out of my family and friends. The watching and not knowing what to do for the best, those feelings of uselessness in the face of another’s pain, swamping the everyday. It’s the way kindness gets blocked as each tries to find a way to cope with the storm. I try to calm myself And let it pass, but it: No, I suck. Its not a good feeling. 485 30-12-2025
I get up and my partner and I go for a bacon sandwich and a coffee at one of the local garden centres. over a cup of foul tasting coffee (my fault not theirs) my partner and I discuss garden options with the result that we buy a small upright cold frame to over winter some of the seedlings we already have. It means that in January my partner can begin to sow next years flower seeds. With the business done we wander the garden centre and lookover the sale Christmas goods, nothing appeals to us so we drive home.
Once home I fill the bird and squirrel feeders and on impulse open up the Writing Shed. While I run the electric cable to the Shed two robins fly in and chase each other around, I am left to shepherd them out the open door. With my visitors gone I settle down to write notelets to friends. It is my first step to writing letters again, encouraged by my new fountain pen and the feeling of being out of the house. As I write the notes the squirrels play around the Shed and the birds continue to feed from the seed hopper.
With the notes written and stamped up I wander over to the post office and send them on their way. Back home I start to make a concerted effort to drink my way through 2 litres of water in the form of orange squash. The first pint is easy after that its a bit more of a challenge. A friend rings me and we spend time comparing how our Christmas’s have gone. My friend has young children so there are stories of trips to pantomimes, bowling and country houses. It is really good to hear how others have spent their Christmas and what they have planned for New Year. My friend has already returned to work, something that I am free from and glad of it. I begin to flag and so I start to draft the blog against the background of a football match on TV. I’ve started to watch football with the sound off, its far more satisfying. There are crosswords to do as I slide into the evening and of course a meal. Most important is that I continue to drink water. I shall see how it goes and whether I sleep better tonight. One last thought, I was astounded to see that one of my Peony’s is beginning to show above ground, that is just ridiculous!
The weekend after my first chemo went okay. I was tired and a little apprehensive about how I was going to be. I spent a lot of time watching TV, reading and ordering essentials on Amazon so that I could potter about doing odd projects and tasks. The Chemo folk had sent me a large chemo record card which I am supposed to carry with me at all time along with smaller cards so I decided to have a “chemo wallet” and bought a travel passport wallet which could accommodate the large record card without bending it. It also stores my next blood form. I thought it was a good idea, however the range of available wallets was not very inspiring so I decided to perk mine up a bit by sticking a badge to mine. One of my new hoodies came with a freebie patch so I opted to put that on my new chemo wallet. One of my little projects to keep me occupied which turned out well in the end.
My new chemo document wallet
I like this, it seemed appropriate for a chemo rechallenge.
I also took time out to set up the electronic picture frame I was given that can be contributed to by anyone on the family WhatsApp group. It is really neat and means I have a constant display of different family members together at different time, it will also take videos. Its a really neat bit of kit. A very thoughtful present and one that will be very useful when the expected new grandson arrives, which could be at any moment. So the weekend was one of pottering and self observation. I went back to all the photos I have used in the blog to calculate how long it was last time I had chemo before my hair fell out. It turns out that it happened quickly. Just fourteen days after my first session my partner and I visited the living museum in Birmingham where they film Peaky Blinders, it was there over lunch that I discovered my beard was falling out. So if things go the same I will lose my hair by Friday the 9th of January. I will be pleased if it does as it will be evidence that the poison is working. Its all good data.
My biggest challenge is bizarrely trying to drink two litres of water a day, I just cant do it. I manage one and a half litres at the most. I am supposed to be drinking two litres in order to flush the poison through my body and from the conversations I overheard in the chemo suite between a couple of other “chemoees” not drinking enough water can leave you feeling rougher than needs be. So I persevere but I am already fed up with orange squash and water and I am branching out to Red Bull and Lucozade.
Monday arrives and I wake up late feeling rank, its a real effort to pull myself together. I wake initially about eight o’clock but then fall back into a deep sleep and wake up surprised at about ten o’clock or later feeling grim. Its an effort to shake this off but I manged this morning by taking a shower. My partner had gone to the gym so I made breakfast and tried to clear the debris that I had created whilst lounging over the weekend. Once I had cleared the decks there was space to try and catch up with the blog. In my spell of Amazon buying I ordered notelets so that I can get myself writing letters again and give me a chance to use my lovely new fountain pen. So once they arrive today I can get underway and make contact with friends again via written words. At the moment I am not sure how I am but I am torn about exercise. I desperately want to row again but I have not since the 1st of December when I passed blood, which took me by surprise and frightened me. It had not happened since I had my bladder stone removed some time ago and I thought I was clear of such things. I have bought new swimming shorts and plan to go swimming at the gym pool as soon as I feel up to it as I am desperate to do some exercise to combat the chemo effects, one of which is weight gain caused by the accompanying steroids. For now I rest, catch up with reading and writing and try to remain calm. This rechallenge requires me to recognise that I do not have the levels of energy that I had six years ago the first time round. So my watch words are pace and being kind to myself.
Of course inevitably I find myself writing and stuff falls out of me in these circumstances. Here are three that appeared.
483 I feel quite shaky, my rechallenge began on Boxing Day. The sounds of infusion softly intrusive and the sense of something in my vein remains. I watch carefully For things not the same, calculate when my hair will fall and try to drink water enough for a goldfish. Really is not dramatic it’s mundane survival like Claudius accepting the poisoned mushrooms and accepting the consequences and hope that death slides by once more time.
483 29-12-2025
484 I’ve written “this pen this ink” before., but as it flows from my Montblanc the joy is so much more!
484 29-12-2025
485 Fuck sitting in the audience, I’m in the ring! It’s backbone time, I’m a contender swinging with both hands and fighting again. This is the comeback, the rising up and being active. This is my choice, my gamble, my fight, my victory everyday I stand. 465 29-12-2025
Pace is everything, right pace, right time, right result.
Thursday, its Christmas and I go through my morning rituals end up with breakfast with my meds and my pre chemo steroids. After I am fuelled along with the rest if the family there are Happy Christmas messages to read and send. Then comes presents! Wow so many lovely things from techno picture frames and hand casting kits to lovely warm jackets and hoodies. I am sure some of you will get to see them soon. My best and greatest surprise and joy was my partners gift. She has bought me a Montblanc fountain pen with my name on it. I used to have one long ago but it disappeared somewhere in the prison service days, I suspected larceny! I never thought I would have another Montblanc so I am delighted. I also got Montblanc ink which I had never had before. Of course I fill the new pan and write a “here is my new pen” paragraph. It was magical, as smooth as I remembered and so easy to write with. I have been very tardy in my letter writing recently but now I shall return to my writing ways just for the sheer joy using my new pen and friendship of course.
The rest of the day was huge amounts of food, with which I had a glass of red wine, my one unit for the year. There was the King and TV and more many sweet things, including a flaming Christmas pudding and brandy butter and the hanging of the new tree decoration which reflects my partners new gardening interests.
Not everyone has a green house on their tree.
One flaming pudding soon to be devoured.
The evening ends with my meds and steroids as I clamber into bed ready for tomorrow.
FIRST CHEMO DAY
Friday boxing day first Chemo day. I am up and making warm drinks before taking my vitals. All good there after some deep breathing. I get up and have breakfast with meds and steroids and then it is tidying up and preparing for this afternoon. 3pm is poisoning time so I have to make sure I have everything ready and my Chemo bag filled with all the things I need, including my new travel wallet with all my chemo documents and numbers in it along with a book to read, ear buds, phone of course and my journal to jot down any observations or instructions. I shall add a can of red bull and reading glasses, oh of course my emergency power pack. So its all down to ordering an Uber and holding my nerve now. As always the dilemma is what to wear, need to look like I am still capable of being smart without over doing it and have considered what the procedure requires. I have marked time for 25 days doing nothing to fight, today I get started again, my strength and will to live versus the cells that would kill me. Today I stand again.
At the appropriate time I call an Uber and my partner and I pile in and ride in comfort to the hospital. On arrival I hand in my appointment card and get directed to the upstairs chemo suite. My partner and I settle into the waiting area. My partner gets out her knitting and I get out Mahmound Darwish’s Unfortunately, It was Paradise, Selected Poems. There we sit and wait until my name is called early. I enter the chemo room to find it much upgraded from six years ago, it is far more plush and comfortable. I am the only man amongst half a dozen women who are clearly having post head operations therapy.
The new and upgraded chemo delivery bay.
A nurse arrives and checks who I am and prepares me for my session. He gets my cannula in first time (no wobbly veins this time) and ready’s me for my poisoning. He also brings me next sessions pre meds and the additional steroids and just for good luck a pack of anti nausea pills, I’m hoping these will be redundant. So I am ready with my cannula and then my poison bag gets plugged in and the machine start to pump the poison in. So I begin to read my poetry book to pass the time.
Cannula in and ready to go.
After an hour or so the machine beeps and a nurse switches me to saline for a few minutes. At last I am done, the nurse returns and removes the cannula and gives me a fluffy cloud on the back of my hand. Once I have sorted myself out I am free to leave, of course the first thing I do is go for a much needed piss. I collect my partner and we head for the hotel across the way from the hospital. The Uber is super quick and we are soon home. I start drinking water like no tomorrow and return to drafting the blog while watching a rugby game. There are some admin tasks to do like integrating the new drugs, and sorting out my children’s toothbrush but most of all making sure everything is in my diary.
My first kindness to my self
I continue to drink water profusely and of course pee at frequent intervals. It seems cruel to tell a man with prostate cancer to drink 2 litres of water a day. I drift into evening via a festive turkey curry and a share of After Eights. I shall work my way through the evening until it is drugs time and time to sleep.
I am now convinced that I have made the right decision, it feels so much better to be doing something to fight the cancer. I have of course have bouts of hyper sensitivity where I find myself examining every aspect of my feelings and bodily sensations. So far so good, with luck the huge amounts of water will do the job of flushing out the poison and hopefully there will be no nausea. At least now I am in the fight and that is good and Rocket can get to work again properly. I stand and I am vertical.
Sometimes the wind can slow.
Me and Rocket and the Pixies all on this page and very vertical!
Wednesday, Christmas Eve and I wake up to my partner getting ready to go and visit her mother. I take my vitals, which are all good and then I get up and make breakfast. There is a waiting game to be had. The oncologist is due to ring at 11 o’clock but of course he won’t. I get a message from a friend who tells me that an acquaintance from the therapeutic community days has died. A good bloke who had a keen sense of humour and was very good with the children he looked after. Soon after that another friend messages me to tell me that she is moving her husband from the hospital he entered on Friday to a care facility close to home with the hope that he can soon return fully soon. It would seem the world is being unkind at the moment. I scribble a few lines:
482 Its Christmas Eve, I’m waiting for a call, the oncologist. He is going to wave a green flag to set my rechallenge on its Boxing Day way. A friend has messaged to tell me a colleague has died. Another friend tells me she is retrieving her husband from hospital, care home first then real home if all goes well. My partner is visiting her ailing mother and paying the carer. I sit and wait watching the stack of presents under the tree and I wonder; why anyone has faith, or: pick your own punch line. 482 24-12-2025
At last the oncologist rings, not my usual one, which I find disappointing. There is nothing for him to say really. He tells me what I already know about my blood results and asks if I am good to go on Boxing day. He tells me to ring the emergency number if there is anything awry especially if I get a temperature. The call comes to an end and I then start to tidy up and hoover round as a final preparation for Christmas. Finally I pop into the garden and fill the bird and squirrel feeders. At that point I am done. I start to draft the blog having added my contribution to the growing nest of presents under the Christmas tree. All I have to do now is continue to drink copious amounts of water and to indulge in the festive spirit. So I wish everyone a Happy Christmas and hope everyone has a good time.
Monday is a special da. The family all pile into my partners car loaded with Christmas presents and we head of to an arboretum in Morton in the Marsh. w\e crawled along behind the worlds worst and slowest driver for much of the Fosse Way until finally we manged to get lost at the destination and found ourselves on private property on the wrong side of the car park gates. It was the difference between an A and a B at the end of the post code, that’s Satnav for you. MY youngest daughter and family were there to greet us. After a swapping of bags we found the restaurant and sat and had a meal. The youngest grandson was in fine form and a delight. So we sat and chatted and compared news and plans. At one point my youngest daughter took my hand and placed it on her bump and I had the exquisite pleasure of feeling the new to come grandson moving around. A magical moment, the best possible Christmas present I could ever have this year.
After meal and more drinks we went our different ways home before the night drew in. I arrived home with my crew as it became dark and the fog descended. The evening was full of streamed TV and a bit of football before everyone went off to bed. i am so pleased that the family got to see each other before Christmas, and all thanks to my youngest daughters partners dad stepping up and driving them to the meal. He really gave us a great present. Probably the best one we could have asked for, Christmas without family is a bit flat.
Tuesday and I wakeup to a worm drink and the taking of my vitals, all good there. When I get up for breakfast there are meds to take and chores to do. First up I check the time the nurse is to ring me today, its 1pm. I then reads the meters and get my readings off on the App. Next comes the cleaning of the shower head to see if it will cure the low pressure warning and non functioning shower. I replace the plate and the fancy little beads. To my surprise it works so I whip of my clothes and have a shower while the going is good. Perversely when I turn the shower of it flashes up the sign to say the shower head needs cleaning, sometimes you just cannot win.
Feeling fresh and pleased with myself I finally look at my blood results from Friday. They are as I expected them to be but these will be the base line set for the chemotherapy. As the nurse said last time we spoke, she had seen worse. So here they are this is what I am going into Chemo with:
My chemo baseline. My PSA continues to rise.
Just as I finish my blood results chart the chemo nurse rings me. She has clearly read my notes and we proceed to talk through what to expect this time round. it can be summarised by the following:
Drink 2 litres of water a day
Have bloods done 5 days pre oncology review appointment
Take steroids with food
On day of chemo bring afternoon steroids
Will be dispensed Prednisolone on the day with instructions
Give chemo card to reception downstairs
Collect chemo card on way out at reception.
Ring emergency chemo card 24/7 if ill at all immediately.
Do not let sick people near you as immune system shit
Check you have masks.
Will get anti nausea pills in case needed.
This is what 1.5 litres of water looks like. Needless to say I am going to be pissing for a large amount of my life for a while.
This is just 1.5 litres! 2 litres is a lot for one day!
Having spoken to the jolly chemo nurse I help make my partner change the bedding and then return to the blog. Its just turned 1:30 pm so there is lots of time to take the car to the car wash and tick off another task of the day. Before anything else though I order some non alcohol mouthwash as recommended for chemo. I continue to draft the blog before setting off on the afternoons fun. With one or two things done I get a text message to say my regular drugs are ready for collection from the chemist. Not wanting to put things off I get myself down to the village chemist and pickup my drugs. By the time I am home I am out of energy so settle down to watch some of the African nations cup and to do more on the blog.
The evening arrives and there is tea to eat and the rest of the episodes of the series that is being watched. A lazy evening before my night meds and then bed early. Tomorrow the oncologist is ringing me for a final check before I start chemo on Boxing day. There are other things to do tomorrow but whether they happen depends on whether the oncologist rings on time.
Its getting close to the time to release the Christmas Giraffe
Saturday and only two things matter today, Poetry Stanza and the Strictly final, the fact that Brentford win away from home is just a bonus for the day. My partner brings me breakfast in bed, a real treat, and then I am up and trying to get the poem I am taking to the stanza to print out, I need twelve copies. The printer plays up and I have to spend ages getting the errors sorted out. By the time I have it all sorted out its time to leave for the stanza meeting clutching poems. sweets and mince pies.
The Stanza meeting is well attended and there are some terrific poems. I take my “waiting” poem. People are surprised by the amount of literary references in it. Some where in there are references to Dylan Thomas’s Under Milk Wood, Pablo Neruda’s Lament, The Life of Pi and Samuel Beckett’s Waiting for Goddo.
481 I'm asked if I have a plan. I have children's toothbrushes, steroid tablets, and all the paraphernalia to self inject. I've had a pre-emptive haircut, number three all over as I anticipate it falling out. A new set of clippers to control any patchy growth. I have made sure I have a suit that fits me, an act of faith, that at sometime there will be a need to look smart, a funereal perhaps? Hopefully like butcher Beynon's finger, "not his own". I wait and listen for the call, the invitation to the chemo party, to submit to the poison from the Yew tree, that will stiffen the tubercles and kill the cells that are busy devouring me as I wait. I am becalmed in a beautiful boat, left with my enemy and the ever present battle, waiting for reinforcements that may never come, held back for other foes or redirected to those with fewer birthdays behind them. A life of Pi but with an invisible, untrainable tiger. I wait and try not to get excited, to contain the anticipated journey across the seas. But as this silence and this pause goes on my energy drains and I cannot bear the non arrival. Does Goddo ever appear? I feel like the luckless slinger in whom everything sinks. My one lament amongst a life of joy, and so I wait.
481 14-12-2025
Back home I find that Tesco have delivered early so its an easy run into the evening. Curry leads to the final of Strictly. I sit and watch and for the first time I vote for my favoured contestant. I am pleased when the result reflects my vote. With the rest of the evening done I sit and watch the football highlights before I take my evening meds and retire to be. My blood results have come through but I have not looked at them, I do not think they are crucial at the moment, they are what they are and will the base line against which the chemo will be measured. I will of course look at them before I talk to the chemo nurse and the oncology review on Christmas eve. I have not trained now since the 1st of December when I passed blood after training. Although it cleared quickly I have not had the nerve to row since, so its been 21 days since I have trained. I think I want to start chemo before I train again. Having said that as from Boxing day I shall cut out all sweets, cakes, biscuits and goodies. In fact try and eat a healthy diet and exercise more, probably more swimming once the gym pool is back in use.
Sunday and I am awake early and make warm drinks. I take my vitals, all good there, and then I am up as a friend is visiting mid morning. My friend arrives and we sit and drink coffee and nibble treat as we talk about mutual colleagues and experiences in the prison system. It is good to see a friendly face and to be able to chat about so old history. After a good chat and an exchange of presents my friend leaves and my partner and I prepare to go to the local garden centre.
Our raid on the garden centre is successful and I stock up on chocolate creams for the festive season. Hopefully now all our Christmas shopping is done. When I get home I do the last of my wrapping in readiness for tomorrows trip to meet my youngest daughter and family. We are meeting them at an arboretum café half way to their house. With my preparation done I watch a rugby match and draft the blog for the weekend. The evening will see then end of a series that I have been watching and then it will be an early night, meds and bed in readiness for tomorrow.
Friday and I am awake fairly early as today is a busy on. My partner brings me hot water and I get up and dressed in no time at all. I have time to take my morning meds before we both drive off to the gym where we will have our nails done. I sneak in a bacon sandwich before my partner and I enter the salon.
Chloe is doing my nails again today, which is good. We settle on a repeat of Tigers Eye, the one that requires magic with a magnet. So I have several layers taken off and new ones put on. While the ground work is being done I choose my Christmas embellishment. I go for a sparkly Christmas looking elf/gonk. It is a jolly and sparkly piece of small scale art and I think its terrific.
One elf with sparkly hat, terrific.
When I am done I have to dash away and get to the GP surgery in time for my bloods to be taken. As usual my blood person is cheery and painlessly efficient. I have soon given up my vials of blood and on my way to the co-op to get a paper intending to do the crosswords. No paper, so I trudge to the post office and find one there along with the comforting box of Heroes that catches my eye. There is little time for crosswords as I need to fill my drugs dossetes. Tricky this time as I need to include my steroids on the right days pre chemotherapy. So on Christmas day I will be starting my steroid buffer which will go on for three days. An unusual Christmas package to be unwrapping.
The usual caveats apply. This could make you ill.
With my drugs organised I move onto reorganise my wallet component of my phone wallet. I have lots of new cards to carry as a result of chemo and steroids. I throw out lots of old stuff from my phone wallet and neatly arrange my “health cards” down one side. I now have a profusion of emergency numbers to ring if anything goes wrong during chemo.
Now I have all the emergency numbers I could possible have.
Reading the blurb that comes with the drugs and watching the pre chemo videos it’s a miracle that anyone makes it to the end of chemo. When I am sorted I still need to find a way to carry the huge appointment chemo card that I am supposed to carry at all times. Its an A4 piece of paper that is gate folded in three, a really awkward size to carry and prone to damage as it is made of thin cardboard. I resort to an Amazon solution and soon have a travel wallet for tickets and passports winging its way towards me. When it arrives I will transfer all the chemo stuff into it.
Having nibbled a sandwich along the way I now read the latest crop of Christmas cards to get to us and engage in the plan to meet my youngest daughter and her family on Monday. Her partners father as volunteered to drive them half towards us so we can meet up and exchange Christmas goodies and hugs. We will then go our separate ways, one to give birth to a new grandson and one to do battle with Yew tree poison. Its going to be an interesting Christmas and New Year.
The evening arrives and finds me drafting the blog before tonight’s rugby game starts on TV. Its a busy night as the Tesco order for tomorrow has to be adjusted for Christmas needs and I need to decide what poem to take to tomorrows stanza meeting, not to mention some mince pies for the festive table. I eat team and finish drafting the blog for the day. Of all the things that needs doing the Tesco order is the most important and I have a feeling that there maybe many seasonal additions to it, some quite random.
Thursday and it is a long lay in before a late breakfast with my partner. Meds of course and then some organising before I accompany my partner to the hairdresser at the gym. After a swift coffee and mince pie I settle into reading The Memory Police by Yoko Ogawa while waiting for my partner. At the end of the wait my partner and I go shopping for Christmas meat and last minute presents.
At home the post has arrived and with it my new chemo pack. Its like getting a secret club pack. It makes the coming chemo feel more real.
My new club card. makes me feel like I am an exclusive member.
So many cards to carry
The first step.
So I have the paper work now and the admin that goes with it. So tomorrow I take the blood form and get my bloods done ready for my oncologist call on Christmas eve. The ball has started to roll and I feel I am moving forward. With everything read and sorted I draft a brief LinkedIn post to include the publication of The Cancer Years. An Anthology: Man to Man. It feels like I am rounding off an important phase of my journey by doing this. With that done I stettart to draft the blog. It is apparent from my messages that doing a Santa run this year is not going to happen so tomorrow I shall be doing what I can to get DPD to do the leg work for me.
Tomorrow I shall be logistics man and get my nails done before having my bloods done. It feels like life has become accelerated so I will motoring on and resting when I can. Tonight is devoted or research and TV wall paper before downing my night meds and getting a decent nights sleep.
Wednesday and my partner goes off to to see her mother with her brother and I take my vitals, all good I am pleased to say, With a simple breakfast and morning meds done I get down to ringing the Chemotherapy suite. I finally get through and have a very productive chat with the person on the other end of the phone. The up shot is this;
Roland is the lucky winner.
1st prize a set of bloods on Friday 19th December
2nd prize, a telephone chat with the nurse on 23rd of December
3rd prize, a telephone call with the oncologist on 24th of December. Xmas eve.
4th prize. first chemo therapy session (cycle 1) on 26th of December. Boxing day.
What can I say apart from Ta Da! The Rechallenge starts in earnest and I am once again in active warfare with my cancer. Everything goes into my diary and I start to plan. The doctor’s surgery is most obliging and find my a slot on Friday to do my bloods, I shall dash from having my nails done festively to the surgery so the leaches can do their work. I try to order my regular meds through the nhs App as usual only to find that what I normally order is not there. I have a bit of time before I need them so I am going to give myself time before I go back in to see if they are there. It maybe there is a restriction on how quickly I can reorder. That’s my working theory. If they do not reappear soon then I will leg it down to the surgery and find out what’s going on. With some admin out of the way the path is clear to write the neighbours Christmas cards and deliver them. Next on the list was taking the 25 kilos of bird seed down to the garden shed and filling the bird and squirrel feeders. The birds in my garden appears to be very hungry and capable of eating me out of house and home. Darkness falls rapidly and it is not long before my partner returns from having afternoon tea with a friend.
The evening descends, there is a football match to watch, but I have thinking to do about presents, sending, delivering and juggling a now crowded Christmas season. There is also still work to do on the new website and some chores left to do. There are Christmas storage boxes to go back up into the loft. Ultimately it will come time for night meds and sleep.
