CHEMO II THE REBOOT DAY 42

Fight, even when it looks bleak.

Wednesday and I wake up to find my partner is taking a rest day after yesterdays trip to the hospital. I check my vitals and then get up to my morning meds and breakfast. From then on I am busy doing stuff around the house. The dishwasher needs cleaning out and the filters checking again so I get to it and empty it out and re-align the filters. With my first job done I turn my attention to the dripping overflow in the downstairs toilet. After spending a long time wrestling with a dodgy inlet valve and eroded ballcock I give up and phone the local plumber. I leave a message and pack away my tools.

After a late lunch I listen to some episodes of The Infinite Monkey Stage and then prepare to train. I really do not feel like it but make the effort. Belatedly I go to the garage and set myself up for an half hour session and get going. Its hard work and my body complains but I get to the end of the session having completed 5K+. That will do me for today.

A short but completed session.

As usual I record my session and listen to some more Infinite Monkey Cage. My partner returns from visiting her mother and we drift into the evening with football and the new series of Shetland. The blog gets drafted and I take my evening meds before heading for bed. So I come to the end of my second day of no sweets, treats and biscuits, already my body is wondering what is going on, so I guess I just need to persevere and get through the initial phase and then keep going till Christmas. It will be okay as long as I see a drop in my weight, it doesn’t have to be a huge drop but a small consistent fall would be motivating.

The universe gets ever more wonderous

CHEMO II THE REBOOT DAY 41

Fight, tough Fight clever.

Tuesday and I wake to find my partner has booked an appointment with the GP. I take my vitals, all good there and then get into my training gear ready to row. My morning meds slide down and I am about train when my partner returns from the GP. We are off to the emergency day centre as the GP has referred my partner to it to have her heart checked.

We pull into the hospital and I drop my partner off and try to park the car closer than before but end up at the back of the main hospital carpark. I raid the snack shack for food and a paper and make my way to the clinic and find my partner is already being seen. After a few minutes she appears having had initial bloods done and her vitals checked we settle into wait and I eat a sandwich breakfast.

So here we are again.

After a wait my partner is called into to see the doctor, the outcome is that there are to be more tests so the wait goes on. We read the paper, do crosswords and read a book. We have done this before. During this time I get a phone call from the hospital that I had booked into to have my Dupuytrens Contracture dealt with. They have turned me down due to my medical history and current conditions. The hospital is a small one and they clearly feel they cannot cope if anything goes wrong. So I am told the hospital has returned the referral back to my GP who will have to re-refer me. We nibble and drink until about 3 o’clock when my partner is called in again. We go in to hear what the medics have to say. Its all good news, my partner has the heart of a lion, nothing wrong, it appears the symptoms are a result of a combination of stress and something labelled in the medical world as exercise lag. So all is within our own grasp but will take time. We leave to find the car in the car park.

Arriving home I unpack the uneaten food and drink and as my partner settles down to rest I change into my training kit for the second time and head for the garage and the rower. I strap in and set myself a 45 minute session. My body is not keen and I feel sluggish but press on. In the end it turns out a reasonable session. At least I manage to get 8K+

Not bad after a long day.

The evening starts with a simple tea and moves onto another episode of Show Trail. I started to draft the blog while waiting for Tesco to deliver and the kick off of a European football match. Tonight will be an early one of clearing up, taking my night meds and going to bed.

Choosing the best is difficult.

CHEMO II THE REBOOT DAYS 39 & 40

Fight and grind in the winter cold.

Sunday and I wake up in the same strange bed from yesterday. I take my meds and join the rest of the family who are up, which of course includes my youngest grandson. There is breakfast and then I set about replacing the broken power socket in the kitchen which has the new dishwasher plugged into it. Its a strange damage as the back box has shattered and left the front plate in tact. I turn off the power and get to work. It’s fiddly and tricky as the replacement power socket has a deeper back box. All I have as tools are ones I had delivered with the new socket. Its old wiring, still using the red and black coding but it means the wire is solid copper and not flimsy woven wire like the modern Blue/Brown wiring. I finally get the wires matched to the new socket but I have to use the old screws to hold the back box onto the kitchen island wall. Ultimately the new socket is fixed to the wall with a small gap but it is attached soundly and all the wiring is safely enclosed. I plug in the dishwasher, return to the fuse box, cross my fingers and throw the switch. No bang and everything works, job done. I clear the kitchen and then join the family in playing with the array of entertainments that the youngest grandson has.

There is a sleep period for the family except me who sneaks off to watch a rugby match on the laptop. The family go for a walk and later we all dine on the crock pot meal that was prepared earlier. Of course there is only only one thing to do on a Sunday night and that is to watch the Strictly results show followed by the Antiques Road Show. The youngest grandson is asleep in bed and people are flagging so that by the time we have watched the first episode of Show Trail every one is off to bed. I take my night meds and settle down. I tricky night as the young one wakes up full of tears and cries. My partner gets up to help and then returns before the small ones dad returns home from a trip to Poland.

Monday its time to get up and to have breakfast before packing and driving off home. The youngest grandson has just got used to us and is holding his arms up to my partner to be picked up and even gives a small baby kiss to her. We drive the pretty no motorway home stopping just the once for a drink and a comfort break. Once home everyone is tired but despite this my partner and I go shopping to get some food for the evening. Having grabbed provisions we have a coffee and I do a Tesco order before we return home. One thing that I had overlooked when we had the new side way gate put in was that no one could access the emergency key safe at the rear of the house which meant that my eldest daughter could not get in, so it is now relocated. There are always details to attend to that go under the radar. Once in, there is some napping to be done by some, I do my unpacking and do some life admin. With a bit of breathing space I catch up with the blog. This is not the most exciting blog but the very ordinariness of it is a pleasure. For so long the ordinary has been a real test, so to be able to go away for a weekend to be with family has been a real pleasure and reinforces the idea that I am recovering some of my old energy and ability to do things.

There has not been enough energy today to train, so that will be a priority tomorrow. Tomorrow will also be the second day of trying to cut out the sweets, biscuits, cakes, and other sugar based goodies in an attempt to loose weight before Christmas. I find the only way I can manage this is by absolute abstinence, I’m an all or nothing sort of chap when it comes to things like this. It is like when I gave up smoking, I went from 20+ a day to zero in a day, that was the last weekend in August 1981. In the September of 1982 I ran my first marathon. Its pretty much the same with alcohol, the reality is never as good as the fantasy. Only Armagnac lives up to expectations, followed closely by a “medicinal” brandy. However for now the new regime excludes these things. My evening will see me watch some TV, take my night meds and see me go to bed early so I can get to grips with my new regime in the morning.

Hoping for calm flower gardens.

CHEMO II THE REBOOT DAY 38

Fight, spooky and unnatural.

Saturday and I wake in a strange bed in Cinderford where I am visiting my youngest daughter and her son. There are croissants for breakfast to go with my morning meds and a young child who wants to join. As a unit we are pretty organised which means by just past 10 o’clock we are on the road with two cars and on our way to Over Farm for their Spooky farm and pumpkin experience. We get in with our two bags of animal feed and some trail completion cards and set off. Immediately someone offers to take our photo for us, and obviously we cannot refuse.

The crew out for mischief.

There is lots to do and animals to feed as well as a tractor ride to go looking for the farmers lost pumpkins. When we were tired of donkeys, sheep, pigs, llamas, ostriches, chickens, goats, horses and pumpkins we had warm drinks and watched the show put on to entertain the children. All in all a really good time. Having exhausted the pumpkin spookery we visited the farm shop and bought pasties and other local goodies to eat back home. A thunderingly good time for everyone.

Some of the stranger uses of a pumpkin.

We return home and eat some of our farm goodies and then sped time playing with the young grandsons toys, until I break ranks to watch the rugby international, which England lose. There is time to take in the Amazon delivery of the new power socket I am going to put in tomorrow and to drat the blog before the youngest grandson goes off to bed and he rest of us eat and settle down to Strictly for the evening. We are all tired so for me its an early night and early night meds. Its been a day out which for me has been very good, it another step to getting back engaged with things.

A good day with pumpkins.

CHEMO II THE REBOOT DAY 37

Fight and strive every step.

Friday and I wake to find my partner up and around. I take my vitals and make myself breakfast to go with my morning meds before taking a shower. What is left to do is pack for the weekend and clear the kitchen. With the house sorted there is time for a pre travel sandwich and then its into the car and my partner drives us off to the forest of Dean to our youngest daughters house. I am pleased that I have survived the journey so well as a passenger. In the past my condition has made his difficult but today it went well, somehow being the driver has proved to be a useful distraction but being a passenger has been difficult, so day is a good day.

Its a good journey and we arrive safe and sound to warm drinks and biscuits. It is not long before we are unpacked and organised and my youngest daughter and my partner go off to collect her son from nursery. He returns looking sleepy but perks up with a new book to look at. After a bath and food the young ones goes to sleep and we the adults eat and settle down to watch a film, while I also keep an eye on a rugby match and then draft the blog. Its been really good to sit with all my family again and although this has been an “ordinary ” day its been a good one. During the evening I respond to an email that invited me to choose which clinic I want to go to have my Dupuytren’s contracture treated. The first two I chose had no appointments, the third is in Coventry, but all of them are saying treatment will be between 20 and 27 weeks. I knew this was going to be a long haul. I take my night meds and then get off to bed, smaller than at home so a challenge, hoping for a peaceful night. Tomorrow I am hoping the new power socket that I ordered from Amazon arrives so that I can replace the damaged one in the kitchen, it appears I like to remain useful.

Look out over it and wonder

CHEMO II THE REBOOT DAY 36

Fight, cunning and clever.

Thursday and I wakeup after being plagued by not being able to remember where someone lived. I had to get up in the middle of the night and look at my address book to finally get the searching out of my head. I knew which letter of the alphabet it started with but could get no further. Once I had got the name of the town I was able t settle down to sleep. I woke up and of course tested my self to see if I remembered he name of the town, I did. My vitals were good again and so I set about checking my messages and emails. Amongst them was one from my energy supplier telling me they were upping my direct debt in December by thirty pounds. Probably time to get the thick jumpers out and to use electricity rather than gas as its cheaper per unit. This is my last chance to train before going away tomorrow to visit my youngest daughter and her family so I get up, take my morning meds and set the dishwasher going, which now seems to be okay.

Once in the garage I strap in to the rower, set myself for 445 minutes and get under way. I feel a bit sluggish but seem to be ab le to pick up the pace a bit as the session goes on. 9 kilometres seemed beyond me at one point but I made an effort over the last few minutes and pulled my deficit back so I made it 9 kilometres two days running. This earns me a day or twos rest.

Another 9k+, this is good stuff.

I record the session in my journal and then set about up dating my blood pressure and vitals spread sheet. It takes a while to do all the data entry but eventually I get up to date and do the stats on the figures. The average blood pressure for cycle 17 has come down significantly after my hiatus with the cardio people and the interrupted chemo. Cycle 18 so far after the first week is showing the same sustained fall, which means I am managing to combat the major side effects well and also getting fitter. It gives me hope that I can get my weight down when I start phase 2 next Monday when I get into my abstinence diet where I shall cut out sweets, biscuits and other sugar ladened foods. But that is for Monday. With the life admin done I get changed and go for a late lunch with my eldest daughter.

The village pub serves reasonable food and is busy today. We order and ten chat while we wait for food to arrive, it takes a while but when it arrives it is very welcome and tastes good. My treat is a steak baguette with onions and horseradish. The pub fills up and gets quite noisy, which I am not sure I like anymore, I hate the having to strain to hear properly. Its no that I cannot her my daughter more that the surrounding noise is intrusive. We finish our meal, pay and leave then head for the co-op to get a paper so I can do the cross words. The news content does not interest me much and I skim over it, its mostly right wing bleating about the budget and people sharing things about themselves that I have no wish to know about. Once home I dash through the crosswords, pleased that I do not need Google and that I get to use the word Squab (baby Pidgeon). With that done I clear the kitchen so my partner can prepare tea and I start to draft the blog. On checking my fitness App on the phone it would appear I am all good except my weight, here I am really not good, so it is timely that I have timetable my next phase for Monday.

My evening will be some reading and TV and beating off any one who tries to mug me for candy, this being Halloween. There is one thing I will do and that’s raise a small glass in memory of a friend and colleague who passed five years ago. I think it is import to keep his ripples going. Then it will be meds and bed before tomorrows flurry of travel and family.

Happy Halloween, may your buckets be full.

CHEMO II THE REBOOT DAY 35

Fight and take a grip.

Wednesday and I wake up later than I wanted and immediately phone the GP surgery to get an appointment. I am in luck, despite my lateness in ringing I get an appointment mid afternoon. With the appointment sorted I take my vitals and find them to be good. My messages checked I get up and get into my training gear. I take my morning meds on the way to the garage and my rower. Once sorted I set the session for 45 minutes and get under way. I start fast expecting to slow towards the end but to my surprise manage to keep going. The outcome is that I row a new personal best since I started training again. I am really pleased, it feels that at last I am gaining ground, if I can keep this going I will be ready to get to grips with my diet, but that wont happen until after the weekend visit to my youngest daughter and grandson.

9.5k+ and 600+calories in 45minutes is a new best, go me!

I record my session in my journal and then sit and watch the Budget while eating a bacon sandwich. Once I have grasped the relevant issues in the budget I take a shower and spend time reading more of Tom Hanks short stories. At the appointed time I walk down to the GP surgery and wait for my turn. After about a half hour wait I get called in. I slap my hand on the table and say “what’s that doc” and with out a moments hesitation he says “that’s a Dupuytren’s contracture”. He follows the required algorithm, notes my finger is more than 30 degrees bent, the finger will not lay flat on a table and a pencil could be passed underneath it. He types all this in to his machine and then prints out my referral letter. So in 10 days someone will contact me and give me an appointment date, doubtless a long way in the future. Ultimately it will probably mean an operation on my hand but I very much doubt that is not going to happen very soon. I return home via the post office where I send a letter off and get a paper.

Once home I do the crosswords and while I am working away I get a call from the cardiac unit in response to my call to the specialist nurse. The nurse has reviewed the correspondence between my oncologist and the cardiologist and agrees it looks like I do not need an appointment so she is organising a conversation in the cardiology team and will let me know the outcome. I see this as a good outcome. Today is turning out a good day. I return to my reading until my partner returns and the family eat tea together.

The evening is filled with a film, a Tom Hanks film Otto, which as I am reading his short stories is interesting. I keep an eye on the football scores and also on a friends reunion of family that has been abroad. At the end of the film I draft the blog, take my evening meds and go to bed. Tomorrow I need to train again so that I can go away for the weekend and have a rest period.

Family at home is precious.

CHEMO II THE REBOOT DAY 34

Fight, with every fibre, every minute.

Tuesday and I wake up with my partner gone to work. I take my vitals and find them to be very good so I do some life admin and then get up. I get into my training gear and take my morning meds. The garage is quite cold so I set myself up for a 45 minute session and get underway. I am feeling sluggish and it is hard work. I am 17 minutes into the session and a friend rings, so I suspend my session and have a long chat with my friend. It is a real pleasure to be able to chat and to catch up with news and how we are. By the time our conversation is over my session has timed out and I start a new one only 30 minutes this time. So with the Infinity Monkey Cage in my ears I restart my row. It goes okay.

This is quite good and when added to the other 17 minutes of rowing is a reasonable session.

I record the session in my journal and then have a late breakfast. The Tesco order is supposed to be here between 2 and 3 o’clock so I settle down to read more of Tom Hanks short stories. I get messages telling me the Tesco truck has broken down and my delivery is going to be late so I continue to read. After a while I decide to write a letter until the delivery finally arrives. The weekly goodies get taken in and squirreled away and the kitchen cleared and the bins put out, then its back to the letter writing. By the time my partner gets home I am tired and the collective decision is to go for take away this evening. I do the days crosswords and then there is a evening in which to finish DI Ray. Finally I take my night meds and go through my pre bed routine.

And some waves

CHEMO II THE REBOOT DAYS 32 & 33

Fight, hand to cell in the biological trenches

Sunday arrives and I read for a while before getting up to have breakfast with my partner. Once again my vitals are good but I do not get to train today. Instead my partner and I go to a new garden centre based on a farm which also has a huge child’s soft play and adventure area. This is next to a restaurant with an eighteen hole putting course in the next floor up. It seems an ideal place to take my youngest grandson when he next visits. Of course we tried out the garden centre restaurant and managed to come away with some goodies like fig jam and an odd impulse buy like a sack of narcissus. Once home there was of course of rugby to watch and time to read more of Tom Hanks short stories. By the evening I am flagging and end my day with my night meds. Monday must start with training to loosen me up.

Monday and I wake to good vitals and time to have croissants before my partner goes to the gym and I head to the garage to row for an hour. I set myself up ready to get going but the reality is that my session starts off very sluggishly. As I warm up I get better and I get to the end having reached my now regular target of 11k and 700+ calories burnt.

Not bad for a Monday morning.

With the session recorded and the blog caught up with I shower and then run off a hard copy of a friends PhD proposal to read and write all over. Before I can get to the proposal I need to fill the bird and squirrel feeders and I also bring in the garden camera. I go through what the camera has captured and to my joy the hedgehog appears adn seems to be quite well and active. So this is a happy thing to find.

Alive and well!!!

Having sorted out my garden camera I return to the PhD proposal and paw over my printed copy. I scribble notes and think about what I want to say that might be useful. After a period of cogitation I draft an email with my thoughts. I hope they are useful. Tea follows and I settle down to my evening of TV and reading as I can feel my remaining spoons ebbing away. There is much to start to think about as November nudges the door with birthdays and Christmas coming into view. It is the time of year to get bulbs into the garden and hard prune some of the shrubs so if the weather can hold up I might get on with this. It is also time to record some more of the latest poetry collection for the YouTube channel, which is a decidedly bad weather activity.

Autumn turns warm colours

CHEMO II THE REBOOT DAY 31

Fight, grind and persist.

Saturday and I am awake quite early, my partner already up. There is time to take my vitals, once again all good, before a shared breakfast. The post arrives and in it is another letter from the cardiac consultant who is responding to my oncologist. Apparently the cardio consultant agrees with my oncology consultant in that he can see no reason why I was given a diagnosis of angina when I was admitted to hospital. On the end of the letter is a note addressed to me telling mem I have a strong and healthy heart! This is really good news and means I can think about pushing myself some more.

My partner goes to the gym and I head for the garden. I spend a lot of time putting in new support poles for the new willow screen that I’ve put in. I move some things into the Shed to make room in the house and eventually I am through with the days garden chores. With a bit of breathing space I order a patio cleaning attachment for the new power washer and then settle down to read a friends PhD proposal. It is an ambitious proposal and I need time to think about it. A rugby match follows which is followed by tea and another game featuring my local team. As this plays out I draft the blog and look forward to catching up with Strictly.

My last tasks before I take myself to bed is to take my night meds and go round the house putting the manual clocks back an hour .Tonight I get an hours additional rest!

All good and steadfast.