Its Thursday and as my partner goes off to her physio and to her aqua class I check my vitals and get myself up. First task of the day was to try on my new suit to see if it fits. Its my only formal clothing that I now own which hopefully fits me. I get into the suit and I keep wondering if it is really burgundy as it was advertised. Of course I could not resist a photograph of myself.
Satisfied that I have a suit that I can pass in I get into something more relaxed and make breakfast and take my morning meds. I settle down to update my blood pressure spreadsheet. I note that the bird feeders and squirrel feeders are empty so I pop out into the garden and refill the feeders. In doing so I spot that one of the rose plants has flowered. It is just so strange to see a new rose at this time of year. Of course I take a picture.
When that is done I get my “When I am gone” instruction book ad start to complete it. Its full of things that do not apply to me and a lot of the information needed is well documented in my existing filing system. I fill in as much as possible before my partner returns, but before then a friend calls and we are able to catch up. We talk about the Christmas run in and what is going on for us. This is followed by a message from a shop in town to tell me that my partners Christmas present is ready to collect. So when my partner returns we drive into town. When we arrive I take my partner to the shop and get her to try on the gift. It fits perfectly and so it is gift wrapped and then forgotten.
Once home my partner and I gather up family presents and deliver the to my partners brother and chatted over a warm drink. Retuning home the evening crept up along with its football and food. I had hoped my appointment letter would arrive but I was disappointed. Tomorrow I am going to have my hair cut before the chemo takes it. In the past I have reinvented myself in order to move forward, it seems that I need to do this once again to take me through the next phase of my life. A new suit, short hair and a new look to face the future with. My gamble is that I have the strength to carry it through.
