Sunday and its hot early on. A walk to the shop for a paper and some odds and ends before a bacon bagel on the patio and a quick whiz through the paper. I start to gather up materials to read in preparation for a presentation I am delivering in July. I have twenty minutes to stimulate and inform a conference about recovery. I spent a long time looking for a book I know I have but failed miserably. In the end I borrow books from my daughter and add a few more that I have around. I retreat to the shed with them and begin the reading and thinking. There is a time out when I hang my washing out and then return to the books. So the England game gets closer and I settle on the sofa with yet another glass of water and a few figs. England win! I’m stunned and before I know it I am watching Austria beating North Macedonia, truly it was a real match. A friend rings and tells me about the session she has been to for the afternoon. The family do tea and then I do more football during the evening. I am working on the basis that if I flood myself that I will quickly habituate and return to normal life without too much damage. Tomorrow, I continue to drink vast amounts of water, eat no sugar or carbs and outline my presentation.

Saturday, early morning just gone midnight and I log into to Patient View to see if my blood results have been posted yet. They are and they are not comfortable reading. My PSA level is up, my platelets are down and my Urea level is up. I am taken aback and go to bed with options going through my mind as I try to think it through. In the morning or the afternoon I will print them out and give them more thought.

I wake up in the morning and make tea and coffee and chat to my partner about my blood results. I have a couple of working hypothesis the main one being that I was dehydrated at the time of the sample that could account for the Urea and Platelet score. The raised PSA score, although in the “normal” range, has more than doubled. My initial thought is that I have slipped into eating too much sugar and fed my cancer. The working solution is to drink water and stop eating sugar, with a view to getting another blood test after a month to see if it is having any effect. Breakfast comes around late on the patio after a shower and choosing what I am going to wear to my first social solo outing at lunchtime. Just after eleven I am on the road to Burton on Trent, to a marina to meet with a group of friends from work days.

Dead on noon I arrive, park and then whilst I walk over to the restaurant endeavouring to look cool I fall arse over head and graze my knee. I young guy offers me help and asks if I am okay. Of all the things I feel, it is not cool. I queue up to book into the pre booked Breeze Hut. All goes well until the “host” points to the square dotty thing on a card and says “just check in”. No I haven’t got the app so I waved my phone in the general direction of the square dotty thing and said “got it”. We smiled at each other and she directs me to the Breeze Hut. I slightly limp over to the hut to find three of my friends there. Hugs! That was weird but good and then we sit and start to chat until joined by another of our friends. We eat, we chat and check out how each of us is. We get the waiter to take pictures of us like tourists. The two hours fly by and we are evicted to an ordinary table on the veranda where we end up in fits of laughter as we remember some of our history and the escapades that we have had during lockdown. Eventually we say farewell and I drive home to watch football and to think more about my blood results. Its not every football match you watch where some one collapses from a heart attack and needs to be CPR’d and defibrillated on the pitch while their team mates form a human curtain, it kind of concentrates the mind a bit. Football over I have a smoothie and write the blog.

Friday, 8 o’clock bloods at the GP. Goes smoothly so I just wait for the results to be available on the app after midnight tonight. I go home and cook a bacon bagel and then go to the shed to write letters. By eleven o’clock I’m ready to post the letters and collect the dry cleaning so I dive off to do both. I get home in time to hand the car to my partner so she can go and get her x-ray done. I get lunch and then get ready for my two o’clock meeting. Just before the meeting a friend rings and we are able to have a quick hello before the meeting opens on my screen. the meeting is very productive and informative, a good use of my time. I then drove off and collected my youngest daughter from her circus skills class and raided Sainsburys for goodies not had since the start of lockdown. Home and I get into the garage for an hours row. I am magnificent and row a personal best. Not something I expected at the moment but hey I will take what I can get right now.

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The family dine and then I settle down to watch the opening match of the Euros. So good on a bigger TV screen. Italy beat Turkey 3 -0. At the end of the game I sort out my direction to tomorrows lunch date where I am meeting a group of friends from previous work places. We have booked a breeze hut for a couple of hours. Its going to be odd to be seeing each other again and being able to talk face to face and hug. It will be interesting to see if we can remember how to talk or have a conversation. Directions sorted, I write the blog. These blood days are always tricky as to whether I stay up past midnight to see my blood results or wait till the morning. In the meantime I eat wine gums and type. This is how cancer is, the ordinary played out under the shadow of the unknown. Whether my cell surface chemistry has found a way to overcome the medication is the constant question that the blood tests answer. Or they at least give indications of which way the wind is blowing and how hard.

Wednesday and an unusual day, I spent the morning with the Elders group and then the afternoon in the garden. The morning with the Elders was a stimulating time and I am looking forward to meeting them in person in August. In the afternoon I put some pots of blue poppies into the garden, took more photographs and got the garden guy to clear out some of the beds.

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I take a coffee break and sit on the patio and realise that the new parasol has brought a new phenomenon to the garden experience in the sunshine.

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At the end of the afternoon we decide to get a take away as a midweek treat, so I order from our usual place in the knowledge that it will take at least an hour to deliver, giving me time to train. Order in, I get into my kit and go to the garage to row. As I start out a friend rings on her way back from a work assignment and then after 20 minutes my partner comes in and tells me that the Indian meal has arrived. This is unheard of, such speedily delivery has never happened before. I end both my call and my session to go and eat.

Post Indian meal I watch some crap TV and then have the delight of the Great British Sewing Bee, where I am introduced to the wonders of traditional Oxford Bags. I am quite taken by them but did not realise how much at the time. I while away the rest of the evening before collapsing into bed.

Thursday and this was going to be a full day so I am up early and shower. I open my last remaining stock of CK one and make a mental note to put it on my to get list. I attempt to make breakfast but get interrupted, so I abandoned any hope of it and prepare for my early start meeting. The meeting starts on time and work our way through a solid agenda. At about the mid point of the meeting I got distracted and research Oxford Bags and found to my delight that a certain company make them the traditional way. So many fabrics to choose from but I am taken by the a heavy fabric version and before I know it I am the proud owner of a pair of Oxford Bags from Some Like It Holy Vintage Reproduction Clothing. I get back to the meeting, feeling fashionable. The meeting comes to an end giving me half an hour before my next meeting so its a quick lunch adn back in front of the screen to host the penultimate Open Forum. It is an intense session with people saying and exploring some really important things. At the end of the session my co host and I have a quick debrief and then we move on. I package up the two gifts that we are sending to the two most consistent attendees of the Open Forum as a recognition of their contribution. I trot over to the post office and post my parcels off and return home plant up a peace offering of sun flower seedlings and to wonder my garden thinking and noticing the flowers of the day.

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Its Thursday so its tuna pasta for tea followed by the treat of a Magnum ice cream. Whilst enjoying this a friend calls from the depths of a traffic back up on the way back from a work assignment. We talk about the work issues that have arisen and then generally about the pains of traffic back ups and all that it entails. My partner gets on with her singing lesson while I catch up with the blog. I find myself preoccupied as tomorrow is the day I give a blood sample before my oncology appointment on Tuesday. It will be an early start and then it will be onto a work meeting later in the day.

Tuesday and another sunny day. Breakfast and a call from a friend to start the day and then some work before my one to one with my work manager. The meeting went well and I took away some task to do. Lunch was a smoothie and then I set about giving the garden chair a final coat of oil. A very satisfying job to do.

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By the time I finish its time to be pulling on the training gear and get myself into the Shed and get on the bike. As it is sunny I decide to go for an hour and a half session just to up the work level for the week. It turned out to be a reasonable session and brought my attention to the peony that had burst into flower.

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I end my session and take pictures of the peony and some other of the surprises in the garden. Its then time to put the bins out and to changeout of my kit and start to write the blog. A friend rings and we have a brief chat about our busy work commitments over the coming days. I return to the blog until tea is ready. I again return to the blog and finish it off before settling down for an evening of reading, bathing and some initial thinking about a presentation I am preparing. Tomorrow I have an Elders meeting, and another training session to look forward to.

Monday and the household is back to working normal that means a muesli breakfast for me and an early retreat to the Shed. Of course Hook, the new parrot had to come to oversee me writing letters.

I spend the morning writing letters and taking a call from a friend who owned up to be being responsible for the arrival of Hook. My next task is collecting up the families dry cleaning and taking a drive to the local Sainsbury’s that hosts the cleaners to book the garments in. Cost an arm and a leg, I will not be doing that again in the near future. I return home, posting letters on the way and down a bowl of chicken soup before deciding where to put more potted plants around the garden. As I wonder around looking for suitable spaces I notice some more of the plants are flowering or doing interesting things or looking just plain beautiful.

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I return to the Shed and frame the post card that my friend sent me and add it to the art collection on the Shed walls.

Its time for me to close up the Shed and to go and train. Today is time to get back on track and to start the serious stuff. So today it will be an hour on the rower at a reasonable resistance level.

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I change and get ready for tea and then I move the car off the drive so that the Tesco delivery driver can do their work easily enough. Right on queue she arrives and we do the delivery shuffle with the trays and send the driver on her way. With everything away its time to eat and write the blog. Tonight I shall try to read more of Shuggie Bain and try to avoid becoming morbidly depressed by it.

Sunday and an early breakfast as I organise a bucket of compost and my garden tools having weighed in at 22.8 kilos. Not a good weight so it is back to the strict diet and exercise routine next week. Today my partner and I are going to see her mother and oversee the handover of her carer. We organise during the morning and set off at midday. When we arrive I set to and replant all the patio pots and clear away the unused pots and stands, finding a frog resident in a water filled tray.

The handover of the carers takes place and one of the carers wended her way via taxi. We sat and chatted for a while before we left for home and the welcome refreshment of coffee and a danish pastry. I discover I have an Amazon parcel, which was a mystery as I was not expecting anything. On opening it I find a parrot! No indication who has sent this to me but clearly someone who is aware of my comments about needing a parrot and an eye patch to go with my new scar. Its a handsome Macaw and appears friendly, but no one is owning up to sending this particular bird.

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We ring our youngest daughter and chat. Its good news as the people they are waiting on to move out of the house they are have found a house themselves and are looking to move as soon as possible. Better still she is going to come and visit us on Fathers Day weekend. Call over I settle down to watch England’s last friendly game before the European championships. It was a boring one nil win. I eat tea and moved on to watch Canada play Finland in the final of the ice hockey world championship. It was a great game and at two all at full time they went into sudden death extra time of three on three. Canada snatched it with the required goal six minutes into the over time. It was a great game and everything the England game was not, fast, competitive, exciting and skilled. Interestingly even the back room staff like the kit manager and physio get a medal as well.

I recover from the excitement of the game and settle down to write the blog. Tomorrow it is time to get back to the discipline and shed activity.

Saturday starts with the payment of the above. This is what happens when you give a lift to your daughter because the fucking bus did not turn up to take her into town. Irony or what that due to a bus not turning up I get a fine for being in a bus lane at the train station. The good news is that because I’ve paid it before 14 days it only cost me £30. So that was the first job of the day as soon as breakfast was over and my weekly drugs wallet is filled. The post arrives and amidst it is a postcard from a friend from the Yorkshire Sculpture Park, it is a long time since I have been to YSP but intend to go soon and see what new sculptures there are to see. My partner and I go to our local garden centre to buy plants for her mothers patio pots, which I will replant tomorrow while my partner does the hand over from one carer to another. I discovered that I do not like queuing in the hot weather in a mask. We return home and I set about weeding out the front bed to make room for the new carnations. I intermittently watch the semi finals of the ice hockey championships as Canada beat the USA and Finland beat Germany. Once the garden was sorted it was time to wash the cars free of the coatings of grey dust they had acquired due to the road resurfacing that was done after the tarmac spillage earlier in the week. I take time to walk the garden and find the Iris has opened up more, its scent is heavy and intoxicating. This Iris is now at least over 75 years old. My grandfather returned from the first world war and found there was no work anymore fro a blacksmith so walked the streets of the land fit for heroes until he finally got a job as a gardener at Kew Garden. One day they were sent to clear plants from a large estate house where he found two types of iris. He took some home and grew them. When my parents moved into the house in Chiswick he gave them some to grow where they still thrive. When we moved into our current house my mother brought the two types of Iris to us and we have grown them ever since. These two strains of Iris have been part of our family for four generations now and smell as aromatic as they always have.

Eventually its time for tea and an evening of TV whilst writing the blog and preparing for tomorrow.

Friday and its adventure day. Well at least I’m going out. So while my partner makes breakfast I fill the car and check the tyres. I open up the greenhouse for the day and then we set off to Matlock Bath equipped with an emergency picnic. Well you never know in this COVID world. I drive the the hour and a quarter to the long tailback to get into Matlock Bath. It would appear that everyone else in the world decided it would be nice to have lunch in Matlock Bath. The parking spaces in the centre were all taken so we drove through to the Sainsburys car park . Here at least there were toilets which seemed a bonus until it cost me 20p to have a piss. However in these modern days you can swipe a card rather than fumble around for loose change. We noted the train availability in the area and the numerous walks.

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My partner and I walk into the town and find a lower tor walk which we follow for a short time before feeling peckish.

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The main part of Matlock is crammed with people, basically Matlock Bath is a seaside town without the beach or donkeys. The consequence of this is that people gather on the street cafe facilities to sun themselves and wonder at the rolling green waves of the surrounding Cromford Hills. We head for a bar towards our car park and settle in to enjoy our first meal commercially produced. Not content with the meal we follow up with coffee and chocolate and walnut cake. A luxury indulgence but worth it. It was nice to have time to enjoy the food and have time to chat away from home. I drive us back and of course head to the garden to see how the garden is. There are new things to see and things that have been ignored. Here are a few:

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I settle on the sofa for the evening and after an amount of unhealthy TV I write the blog. I’ve not trained for two days now and I am getting twitchy and irritated with myself. I inexplicably suddenly feel the wind blows harder around my dandelion clock.

Thursday and I over sleep, so I have 15 minutes before my morning meeting. Is a coffee and then a wrestling match with my IT to get into a meeting. It seems that the link had been withdrawn and only reestablished as people tried to meet. The meeting was fast as others had to be else where so at the end I chat with a colleague about some work activities and our plans for the weekend and beyond. In the middle of this chat I get a call from the hospital telling me that my lunchtime appointment had been moved to 3:30pm. This meant that I could host my open forum as usual. So at the end of the meeting I check the post and find the jungle bedding that I ordered from Joe Browns had arrived. I have a light lunch and then make my way back to the laptop and host the open forum. They are coming to an end soon and finding a way to the finish is always a time that requires some thought and sensitivity. So having completed the forum I find that my hospital appointment has been pushed back to 4pm. I discover a box of plants in the porch and put them into the greenhouse before I go the hospital. I drive to the hospital and check in at 4pm and get called immediately. Apparently my surgeon was running his clinic in London and over ran and then had a pig of a journey back to Leicester. He very efficiently cuts his blue stitching and takes them out in no time at all. He instructs me on scar maturing. I am to massage my scar with any cream around twice a day to soften the scar as it matures. He suggested that this could be done whilst watching TV, so plenty of opportunity for me then. Now I just have to enhance my scar with an appropriate eye patch and a parrot and wait for “talk like a pirate” day comes round again.

I get to home and sort out some plant pots for the new plants and get them tucked up in warm compost and tuck them up for the night in the greenhouse. This is a another attempt on my behalf to grow a blue poppy. I’ve been trying now for several years but without luck, the dream is to have a garden in spring full of blue poppies. During this a friend calls to see how I am after my de-stitching and to talk about half term and the latest sewing projects underway.

Tea is Thursday tuna pasta whilst watching the Canadian ice hockey team beat the Russians in overtime,which was a bit of a surprise given the Canadians lost their first three matches. So now they go into the semi finals on Saturday. Having got that excitement out of the it was time for my partner to have her weekly singing lesson and me to get into the front garden and give the garden chair its second application of Teak oil. I settle down to watch TV and then write the blog. Tomorrow with luck and a following wind my partner and I will take a trip out to Matlock Bath, so we might even get eat out amongst other carbon based units.