Monday, back to the usual domestic routine accept I do not return. Normally I would have gone to the gym or to the Shed. Today I did neither as I struggled to throw off the headache I woke up with. So I dillied and dallied all morning, filling the hedgehogs canteen, topping up the squirrel feeder and filling the bird feeders with seed. Somewhere in there I made toast and took my drugs. I feel like Poo Bear with a head full of fluff. At lunch time my partner and I walk round the village and pop into the shop for a paper and bread. On our return my partner loaded the crockpot, we ate lunch and I did the cross words. The Tesco delivery arrives on time and we squirrel away the goodies. I am free at last to have my afternoon nap. I go to the bedroom, flop on the bed and mutter ” Alexa wake me up in half an hour”, she replies “half an hour starting now”. I fall instantly asleep. In my dark blue numbness I hear an alarm and mutter “Stop Alexa”. My next memory is feeling chill and finding its 5:30pm. My half hour has turned into an hour and a half. I’m a little zombified and stare at the TV and start the blog. I drift through the Fugitive, Perry Mason and NCIS. So uplifting in a world where the good win and the rogues and criminals get justice with no social media spew to distort the reality. I eat tea and continue with the blog and the “good overcomes bad” medicine. By the time I get to the end of the blog draft I am truly zombied. Today has been a morass of treacle, a head full of fluff and increasing frustration with myself. I hate myself like this, I’m inpatient to get better and to recover, I’ve things to do. I loose sight of my real fight and I feel like I am distracted, disarmed and dogged.