Tuesday, the one in a thousand year palindromic date; 22/2/22.

So on this palindrome day I wake early after a very disturbed night in which it seems I was visited by all the friends and acquaintances I have known who have died of cancer. It felt as is my unconscious was working out all my anxieties by using all my own experiences of loss by cancer. My partner brought me a coffee before I got up to make myself toast and another coffee to wake me up. Todays the day of my oncology review so I select my hospital clothes and get my partner to braid my hair. I have to say that as my hair grows I am increasingly drawn to having my hair braided. So today I think it looks really good.

I drive to the hospital with my partner with me and we settle into the waiting room. My appointment time goes by and we wait till eventually I get called in. My consultant; “he who made a pack with the devil” was very up beat and greeted us with “its all good news”. The scans show that there are no new tumours or spread of the exiting ones. The new antiandrogen has significantly reduced my PSA level and there is nothing to ring alarm bells in my blood results. Apparently the new antiandrogen does not work in 30% of cases, works for a few months in about 30% and for the remaining 30% is goes on working for years. So I am at least in the second 30%, time will how long it will work for me. We agree to another review in four months and blood tests each two months. I will have to monitor the first two month blood tests adn if the PSA has risen again I need to tell the clinic so they can readjust the four month review. It is as good as it can get again so I decide that the blog will reflect that. The parting advice from the consultant is that I need to continue to exercise as it is the one thing that has been shown to be positively beneficial. He was clear that it needs to be fairly rigorous exercise so I shall continue to push it at the gym sessions. He also confirms that the tiredness I am experiencing is due to the antiandrogen. Given the importance of staying fit the balance of how I use my stores of energy is an important decision moving forward. I need to readjust what I am doing and ensuring I can look after myself.

I drive us to the gym where we have a celebration coffee and I have a bacon brioche and do the crosswords in the todays paper. After a prolonged rest I go to the gym floor and get on board a cross trainer. Something clicks and I achieve a personal best. I burn 753 calories and I go 10.08 kilometres. I never thought I would break 10 kilometres but hey there you go, I’ve done it. I shower and wait for my partner in the lounge with a large americano. My partner takes me for a surprise Italian meal. We take our time with the restaurant to ourselves. After a satisfying meal I drive us home to find that the squirrel feeder has been burgled.

The evening is taken up with reading a letter from a friend, football and TV until I settle down to write the blog. Today has been a good day and one that gives me some hope for the future providing I choose the right options to take me into the future.