Thursday, I wake up with my partner gone to work. I laze by doing my vitals and catching up with messages and emails. I get a phone call from the prostrate nurse trying to confirm the names I left on my message call. I was still in bed and really had no Scubby Do what they were, but got through the call. My vitals were surprisingly okay so I get up clear the kitchen, shove the washing in the dryer and finally get breakfast. I take my meds including half a tablet of Relosorb XL(Isosorbide Mononitrate), and pretty soon I’m feeling shit, one of the side effects of Relosorb XL is headaches, so its trying to manage that with or without paracetamol. So as noon comes round my plans to visits the library or the village shop/café go out the window.
The post arrives. It is all for me from the nhs. The first I open is another copy of my discharge report from the cardiac assessment unit, I guess it is handy to have a copy, however the second one is for a face to face appointment with the oncologist on Wednesday 21st August at 11:30! In other words yesterday, so that explains why the oncologist rang me at at 5 o’clock yesterday. Am I being picky, but I would have thought that expecting the mail to get to me in time displayed incredible faith in the postal services and secondly who in there right mind would think I was in any condition to return to the same hospital the day after I had been discharged from in a knackered state of fatigue and confusion as to what the fuck is going on for me. So both my letters to me were useless. I resort to the blog to keep my balance. I know I need to keep active to counter the fatigue and tiredness but the meds make me feel shit. I have no idea if its the combination of current meds without my daily cancer pills or the addition of the Relosorb XL. So I am a prostate cancer patient and a cardiac patient with little joining up of the dots as far as I can tell. I am still on Apixaban, a blood thinner with the addition of the Relosorb which is supposed to dilate the blood vessels and relief chest pain by making it easier for the heart to pump. Are these compatible? I have no idea. What would happen if I stop the Relosorb to avoid the headaches? In the meantime I just try to muddle through.
I use the afternoon to edit the first draft of The Cancer Years: Breathless. I update the bio, the acknowledgements, the contents and the dedication. I run out of energy and indulge in watching the first ever Star Wars film which by the end of I am exhausted so take a nap. Post nap I try to get myself going so I go into the garden and fill the bird and squirrel feeders. My partner returns from work and we sit on the patio and catch up with our days and things in general. As we get cold we go inside and later eat tea. The evening is filled with a film and then Freddie Flintoff taking his cricket team of Preston lads to India. I take my night meds minus my cancer pills as agreed with the oncologist. I am hoping that my body will settle down and I can get into some sort of balance. I draft the last bit of the blog and go to bed hoping for relief.
