Sunday and its an important day, today is the 28th day I have been off my cancer tablets. One whole cycle. It is also coincidentally 28 days since my last normal 28 day cycle injection. Tomorrow is jab day. It is also 24 days since I used any pain killers, paracetamol or co-codamol. I’ve also trained 9 times in the last 28 days. So the coming week with Mondays jab and Wednesdays Oncology review seems to be an important one. If my PSA had not risen by 0.5 I would be suggesting a bimonthly use of my cancer pills, which would give me a fighting chance against the fatigue of the medication. But I think we need to get the PSA to drop again in order to ensure it still works on me, so Wednesday will be a negotiation. Of course the angina boys and girls have not been in touch with the result of my scan and whether they are going to propose any kind of intervention or even see me. It might be, in fact likely, that my oncologist will feel he cannot go ahead until the heart boys and girls have done with me. So this week feels like an important week.
I make my partner and I warm drinks and we lay in bed and chat about retirement or more specifically how I knew when to retire. It was partly not wanting to be unprofessional taking my diagnosis into other peoples therapy or supervision and secondly when the other activities held no joy for me, despite liking the people, mostly, that I was doing it with. I just think there comes a time when enough is enough. When all is said and done I have published four books of poetry and have another on the way after the age of seventy five, so life clearly goes on. All this before breakfast and the decision to go in search of winter bedding plants.
Our once favourite garden centre, it was cheap, is a desert. Very few plants at all as if a swarm of locusts had stripped it bare. Cleary there was some sort of refurbishment going on but the prices of what was there has risen. We leave and go to another garden centre and there we find exactly what we want at a good price. We also find lunch time fruit scones with jam and cream! By the time we are home and have unloaded the trays of plants it is raining so I finish yesterdays blog and start todays. I can feel myself rapidly running out of spoons (energy) and wonder if its Red Bull. There is more couch potato creeping up on me!
My evening is listless and full of TV as I fill time trying not to think about tomorrows jab. I take my night meds, finish the blog and go to bed