Thursday and I have a meeting at 9 o’clock. It’s a swift muesli breakfast but to day I make a caffettiera of coffee, fresh coffee to take into my meeting with me. So at 9am I am in front of my laptop with my work colleagues. For the next two and half hours we discuss work and up date each other on the work. At the end of the meeting I have a chat with a colleague and then do a bit of admin. Lunch time comes around and my partner and I drive to the garden centre to get some food for the next couple of days. We have lunch and I print off the documents I need for tomorrows service review. My afternoon is spent in the Shed reading and marking up the documents. I always smile when I read through a work book that are done by services. They always start off being detailed and precise and as the work book goes on the responses get shorter and more fuzzy. By the end of the work book it is almost monosyllabic. People should really start at the back and work forward. Any way after three hours of concentrated reading I have marked up with pretty coloured tags all the relevant parts and responses. I’m about ready as I am going to be so I lock up the Shed and return inside the house. I have also confirmed when I am next visiting my mentor in York and booked my hotel.

My evening starts with dinner and as my partner does her singing lesson I watch TV and idle away some time till I am moved to write the blog. I have not trained. Days like this reinforce my thoughts about stopping work. I have been busy in a work sort of way all day but it does not satisfy me anymore and I end up in the evening feeling that I have wasted a day and that today my cancer got a free ride. It irks me. I know I will get some benefit tomorrow but I am not sure it will make up for the lost time today. It comes down to me being able to put my needs first to keep myself as well as possible for as long as possible.