Tuesday. A grim day. The after effects of my Monday jab hit hard and result in a poor gut and no energy. No appetite and a general feeling of just wanting the day over. This feeling was finally completed when watching the England football team grind out an unimaginative gaol less draw with Ghana late in the evening. I took my meds and went to bed hoping for a better tomorrow.

Wednesday, and I wake up feeling marginally better than yesterday. After checking my messages, email and news feeds I get up and make breakfast. Its the first real meal I’ve had for a while. I eat, take my morning meds and catch up on the BBC news channel. Its the usual stuff, none of which I care that much about to be honest. The major story seems to be that its going to be warm and sunny for a couple of days. Sounds good to me, an ideal situation to laze, drink 0% Peroni and eat Ben and Jerrys strawberries and cream ice cream. It is ideal reading and writing weather, so I firstly catch up with drafting the blog. I try to capture where I am in a poem.

342
Cycle 8 comes to an end,
the seventy five percent dose
has dropped my PSA.
I should be pleased 
but the cost was high.
The fatigue extreme,
the neuropathy worse
and the head fuzzy,
but most of all the weakness.
The oncologist counsels 
“no more”,
I am uncertain,
surely if it’s still working 
then press on.
Reduce the dosage;
try again?
These are questions
that I ponder
on my 
Chemo Summer Holiday.
My fourteen day break
in heat wave England,
I wonder how much
the larger and ice cream
will sway my judgement.
						452 24-06-2026

The day progresses with all the mundane jobs and routines as usual. The bins get brought in, things tidied and I sort out my weekly binge bet on the lottery. I join my partner on the swing seat to relax in the shade of a very hot afternoon. I doze, reflect and drift around in my head for a while as I watch the birds in the trees. My partner asks me where the neck fan has gone. It was one of those gadget that got brought, used for a bit and then tucked away with other “useful” items on a shelf in the office. On returning to the house I dug the neck fan out and plugged it in to recharge it. It looks like with this heat wave a neck fan might just become really useful again. I could not resist a selfie with the neck fan.

Of course at this time of the month its time to read the meters and find out how we are doing on the energy front. Having read the meters and submitted the readings I do the money calculation and find that we are in budget for the month. Always good to know. I get a message from my son in Stockholm who has been offered a full time permanent post at the Swedish Opera House. This is brilliant news. So I go into the evening still feeling fatigued from Mondays jab but feeling a little more up lifted. This evening there will be a world cup football match to watch and then later its Scotland v Brazil. A point will see Scotland through to the knockout stage, it could be a belter or another sad near miss for the Scots.