CYCLE 6 DAY 6

Keep it simple Roland. A better night; still some interruptions but manageable. The night is bad but in the early morning when it’s light I manage to drift off in a more relaxed state. It is a strange but true phenomenon. So this morning I get out of bed about ten and go into my routine of warming the stab stick, having a bacon sandwich and coffee and getting ready to deal with the day. I dress and identify some jobs to do to help my partner who is busily wrapping presents. It’s those last “clearing the decks” jobs ready for Christmas that need doing. So I change light bulbs, put towels away and tidy up .Everything I do makes me breathless and hot and sweaty. It is a combination of effort and spontaneous hot flushes. I am determined to fight today, harder than yesterday and go to the gym. A call from my partner’s mother tells us that one of my partner’s aunts has died. Naturally my partner’s mother is upset at the loss of a sister. It is one more reason to be mindful this Christmas and one more reason to keep looking outside myself as the real world continues to affect those around me.

 I need to pump the poison around me and to try and keep all my systems working and moving. My partner and I go to the gym. I manage an hour on a cross trainer, going at a pedestrian speed I reach 706 calories. I do not make 10,000 steps and have to walk around the gym floor about ten times to get my 10,000 celebration. A long shower and a longer rest in the club lounge drinking hot chocolate, which revives me a bit.

Home and we put out the recycle bin early due to Christmas and settle down to eat and watch the end of “His Dark Materials”. Dust and armoured bears is about as much as I retain; that plus the fact that there are more books to be turned into TV shows. My body begins to ache as a result of today’s efforts so I fight back and order childhood treats for Christmas from Amazon. If I am really lucky I will not need to dash around much over the next couple of days until the main event. Tomorrow is my last self stab day. A milestone I think. I shall try to find a way to celebrate it, but first I will see what tonight’s sleep brings.