CHEMO II DAY 307

Fight and grind with reason and kindness

Wednesday and I wake to a house where my partner has gone to work. I do not loiter long in bed, just long enough to do my vitals and think about my day. Once up I clear the kitchen take my morning meds and head for the village cafĂ©, picking up a paper on the way. I pick the sunny window seat that gives me the best view of the villages central mini roundabout. Its a constant source of drama as cars try to out muscle each other to get around it. As I chomp through my bacon and sausage baguette and slurp my hot chocolate I work my way through the days cross words. I’m on form and zip through them today. I walk home and find post. There is an over seventies driving licence renewal form to do. It tells me I can do it on line. So I set about doing it on line only to find that I cannot do it on line because the DVL cannot authenticate my passport photo and that means I have to get a new photo done. Bollocks is my response to that, but it seems I need to go and get new ID photos done.

In the meantime I fill in the form I am going to have to send and discover I need to get documents out of hiding to fill some of it in, so I am up and down stairs like brides nightdress to gather the info required. I have a long chat with my eldest daughter before my partner returns from work and readies herself to go and visit her mother for the afternoon. With all this done I drive to the photo booth in the local Sainsburys. I get there and find that my money is not sufficient, it is card only, for fuck sake I should have known, money is becoming useless. I drive home and as I get to my house I note an Amazon van parked on the drive, so after circling round the village I return to my drive. There they are in the porch, copies of my new book, the second poetry collection, which I fall upon eagerly and release them from their packets. I really like the cover, these poems are are a bit grim but an honest reflection of what being on the road was like a lot of the time.

My second collection is now a reality.

I return to my photo mission and drive once again to the supermarket and its card only photo booth. These things are always a challenge but on my second go I get pictures that are adjudged to be acceptable to passport and driving licence agencies. I collect the the hard copy from the slot outside and then buy some mint creams to assuage my craving.

This is the new official me

I drive home and start to get ready for the evening. I go to the loo and find I have blood in my urine. I’m just gutted. My response is to drink a load of water, take a co-codamol and get my feet up and distract myself by starting to draft the blog. I have something to eat and then settle down to watch a combo of football and Race Around the World this evening. Of course what will preoccupy me is what is going on with the blood. I am hoping that the old pattern of it clearing quite quickly takes place. So I am in feet up mode, with a lot of water at hand.

By the end of the evening there are no English teams left in European football and more importantly my urine appears to be clear. I take my night meds with a load of water and take another co-codamol just to help me through the night. I am pleased that my second book has become a reality but now I intend to take a break while I prepare some more poems into collections. It feels as if I need to reflect upon what I have learnt and what I want to do differently in the future. Tomorrow is a rest day.

Spot on Eleanor.